---

…if you want to start at the very beginning.
A very good place to start.
And no I promise I won’t break out into ‘Doe a Deer’
(or will I?…)

---

Otherwise, just jump on the bandwagon and join me for day two of our travels, where Thing One, Thing Two, Mini Me and I adopt a little baby alien whilst traveling down the Extraterrestrial Highway.

But first… how it all came to pass.

If you find yourself in Benton in 1875 on the wrong side of the law, this is where you will end up.

NO worries dear friend– I have you covered!

We used this fine contraption to time travel to 1875 and release the only criminal ever to be confined to this jail.

His crime?

He peed in the spittoon!

What?! Say it ain’t so!

Oh, it IS so. You wanna know how he got caught?

No

Well… pull up a chair and I’ll spin you a tail.

You mean tale. Please don’t…

One fateful day, the local sheriff came along and spit in the pee filled spittoon. Well… this sheriff, he had a fierce & forceful spit. The spit struck the pee so hard it flew back in his face– Egads!

I tell ya, the sheriff wasn’t happy about that one bit.

Expeditiously, he captured the culprit and gave him his just desserts.

We landed in 1875 just as the criminal was finishing up his tasty treat.

Little did we know this fine fellow was actually a baby alien.

BABY ALIEN?!

That’s right, you heard correctly.

Only this particular baby alien looked and acted a lot like a teenager. He even smelled like a teenager and I tell you at times it wasn’t pleasant.

“Please take me away from this God forsaken place!” He begged.

Now, you tell me… how in the world were we to leave him? Not one of us had the heart to be so cruel.

That’s not true. Honestly, we needed an extra driver. So, when the baby alien persisited, begging us to take him back to 2020 we all kind of snickered and thought…

‘2020? What else could possibly go wrong?’

Introducing…

Baby Alien, everybody!

Note to all travelers: If you ever travel down this highway make sure you get gas first. The road does not end– ever. And there are no gas stations– period.

Second note: If a young teenage couple driving a brand new Range Rover with Nevada tags stop and ask you if they can syphon gas from your vehicle get the heck out of dodge.
(Baby Alien is smarter than all of us. He sniffed them out from miles away. Hey– Thanks for the heads up!)

I can’t be sure but I think we were abducted, probably probed, definitely studied, and then sent on our way. What teenager has a syphon? What teenager even knows what a syphon is? WE should have suspected something was amiss from the get.

Alien Headquarters

I’m not sure how we made it out alive. Or if we made it out alive. There is really no way to know. But I am here to tell the tale so that’s saying something…

At any rate, eventually, we made it to Utah
As they say Utah Rocks! Literally… rocks everywhere. You’ll see.

---

Continue Here